Wednesday, February 11, 2009

My Zimbabwean Girlfriend

At work, I have a one letter policy. If you're a crazy, I'll still send you a reply, but that's it. I've received a Dollar check for the White House (guy wanted the White House for a buck), letters about conspiracies, curses, and a Native American Gentleman who'd call every couple of weeks (when he was drunk) to ask me for his money the government owed him. My job rocks. Anyway, I was busy yesterday, and replied to an e-mail. I was suspicious, but decided to send a reply. I get this in response. Meet my new Nigerian Girlfriend. Funny, I've been hit on by men and women before, but this is the first time someone has asked me to be their boyfriend.

Dearest ,how are you this day? How was the night i hope fine,let me tell you
about my self my name is Miss Jenny Desmond I am 24 years old, I am hoping to
further my education in this career. I am not married and don't have any
children. I am fair in complexion and of average height, my photos will explain
to you better.


i am the Daughter of Mr.Desmond Cleng, of blessed memory from Zimbabwe,During
the current crises against the farmers in Zimbabwe from the supports of
President Robert Mugabe to claim all the white-owned farms to his party members
and his followers, he ordered all white farmers to surrender all farms to his
party members and his followers.My father is One of the most successful multi
farmers in our country and because he did not support Mugabe`s ideas, Mugabe's
supporters invaded his farm and burnt everything in the farm,kill him and made
away with a lot of items in my fathers farm.


it is only me that is alive now then I have to ran to Dakar Senegal which is
where I am now in a church, have not finish up my education and need a person
who will make use of my fathers wealth and get me through in life,I would like
to know more about you.Your likes and dislikes, your hobbies and what you are
doing presently. i want you to know that age means nothing to me and it can not
hinder me from getting relating with you because i really need a man that is
older than me such man who can take good care of me and show me sincere
love.

I do not want a younger man how will betray me and run away with this money
so please sweetie i am not concerned about the age gap or something of that
nature.I have attached my photo to this email please if it is possible also send
me your photo and your telephone number so i can speak with you.I am waiting
eagerly for your replyLots of lovekiss kiss

8 comments:

Laura said...

I've seen fairer.

Kiss kiss.

Nicole said...

wowsas.

Shannon said...

Sounds like true love to me.

Ramanda said...

I always find your bulletin board fascinating, especially when you have a little shout out to my blog! Thanks for that!
My fav this time is the founding father's rules of civility!

Julie said...

go for it! she'll stay with you, even through the rough times.

Steve said...

Dammit! She told me she was all mine!

Joy said...

Ramanda-I always wonder if people read my bulletin board. Thanks.

Gnomie-Ah, thanks.

Steve-I wondered if our friendship would come to this.

Steve said...

I think the French have a word for the solution I am thinking of! hahaha. :)