A friend of mine recently sent an e-mail to all of his lady friends asking them "if single men seek out attached men"? He asked us to e-mail our friends and then report the results.
A study was published that asked the question above and the results are startling. I'm not going to reveal my own thoughts about the subject at this time except that I agree with the article that often the reason women are single is because of their interest in unavailable men or their unrealistic expectations in a relationship (myself included).
Anyway, what are your thoughts about this subject? The poll is on the sidebar to the left. I don't care if men take the poll too.
http://tierneylab.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/08/13/do-single-women-seek-attached-men/
3 comments:
That was an interesting study. As a woman I can't say I have ever sought out an attached men. Sure at times I've thought that all the great ones are taken but not ever thought of pursuing one of those great guys.
I wonder if the women that said they were interested in pursuing the relationship would ACTUALLY pursue it in "real life" given the opportunity. Responding to a research question is much different than what we do.
I wonder how much media plays a role in that for women... the elusive perfect men/relationships shown on all these romantic comedies. And perhaps I'm stretching it now too because I'm tired. But thanks for getting me thinking Sherpa.
One could also argue that single women aren't so much as seeking out unavailable men as much as normal men and that most of the normal men tend to already be taken. Most of my married guy friends seem so much more normal and great than the single men I know. Of course, I'm not sure what their wives would say. They may be just as weird and have just as many issues but their wives are willing to put up with them anyway.
I don't know many women who would admit to actively seeking specific men who are attached. But, I know many women who are attracted to attached men. I have often wondered if it was because they are attracted to someone who is/was able to make a long term commitment--because if this was the case, wouldn't they then be turned off by someone who would break that commitment to be with them? Or, alternatively, maybe it's easy and safe to pursue attached men because if you don't succeed, it's not a bad reflection on you--the man had a wife. But, if you do succeed, then it must be some kind of feeling of triumph.
Interesting thoughts.
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